August 7, 2018 Blog No Comments

Have you ever noticed how attitude can make the difference in how things go in your life? Last week, I witnessed an hysterical example of how attitude is the big game changer. It all started with a family visit – family with a big 1 yr old hound dog named Bubba and his interaction with my cats.

My cats were not happy.  I have two cats, one is shy around strangers and the other is confident. Gifford, the shy one was soon hiding and wasn’t seen much in the 4 days. The other one, Baxter, was right in the middle of things holding his ground, staring the dog down.

What did the Bubba, the puppy, do every time he saw the cats? He completely ignored Gifford, the shy one, while at the sight of Baxter, he yelped in fear, leaped on the furniture, or hid behind us. Baxter took great delight in his new found power and taunted Bubba’s every move – chasing him around the house, stalking him outside in the bushes. Poor Bubba took to jumping the fence – which wasn’t so funny.

What was Bubba reacting to – what did he notice in Baxter’s attitude vs. Gifford’s that created such different responses? I think it’s worth considering because it’s an example of how we have control over how we “show up” in life and the reception we receive. We have more power over this than we know.

Here are some factors to consider in how your attitude can change your game.

ATTITUDE REFLECTS YOUR BELIEFS ABOUT YOURSELF

Sticking with the cats as an example, I can tell you that Baxter thinks he rules. He simply assumes that the world’s his oyster and he can do or have whatever he wants. Consequently, it’s pretty much true. He has a fan club of people we don’t even know in the neighborhood. When he walks into a room, he acts like he owns the place.

Conversely, shy Gifford lived his first 6 months in a shelter cage. After adoption, it was a year before he came out from behind my pillow. He acts scared and undeserving, you have to work to get his trust. He doesn’t walk into a room, he actually skitters as fast as he can, like he doesn’t want to be seen.

How do your beliefs about yourself effect your attitude? The more you believe in your worthiness, the more your attitude influences and reflects that strength vs the unworthiness that makes you want to hide.

Can you see how positive verses negative beliefs influence your attitude and how you show up?

ATTITUDE AND BELIEFS EFFECT YOUR ENERGY – IT’S READ WITHOUT A WORD

Your beliefs about yourself, just as with the cats, have an energetic signature. Baxter’s energy of power and confidence is transparent and obvious at a glance, just as the energy of Gifford’s fear and insecurity is easily recognizable. Bubba recognized the difference easily and responded accordingly.

Isn’t it interesting – not one word of explanation is needed– we can read it in a cat, just as we can read it in each other. It’s amazing to think about, that the energy of our thoughts can be transmitted so clearly in our non-verbal attitude.

What’s important to consider is that our energy changes as our thoughts about ourselves change.

ATTITUDE AND BELIEFS EFFECT YOUR BEHAVIOR

While cats don’t hide their behavior that communicate their attitudes and beliefs about themselves, we do.  If you know how to read your pets, we usually know what’s influencing the gambit of their happy, sad, mad or afraid behavior. We’re not so easy.

We’ve become masters of disguise to hide our truth. We may act happy to hide sadness, angry to hide fear, push ourselves forward the best we can or simply run the other way. We make complicated games to hide our beliefs about ourselves. While some of that can be helpful under the adage of “fake it until you make it”, what’s most important is that you know your truth.

What do your behaviors say about how you believe in yourself?

CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS/BELIEFS–YOUR ENERGY, BEHAVIOR AND ATTITUDE CHANGES TOO

Would you like to change your attitude and how you show up?

Here’s how it worked for Gifford, my shy cat. He’s made a huge attitudinal transformation since coming out from behind the pillow. He did this by claiming his natural cat instincts. This summer he’s caught 9 chipmunks and a baby possum.  While he’s still shy, he has new found confidence and self-pride.  He stands up to Baxter now and Baxter knows not to mess with him anymore.  There’s an attitude shift between them – more respect both ways.

How do you do this? It takes clarity and determination – following through with doing what you love, what you have passion for, what comes naturally, so you develop self-confidence and new thoughts about yourself. It means challenging the faulty old beliefs that don’t serve you. While this isn’t always a quick and easy task, it’s a very doable, necessary one that’ll bring amazing, positive changes.

Change the energy that you are emitting, starting with your thoughts and beliefs about yourself, your behavior and attitude soon follows.

To summarize: Just as I saw with my cats, your internal attitude about yourself creates an energetic signature that sends a clear and discernable non-verbal message about who you are and how you’re showing up. If you are confident and positive, everyone knows it, just as insecurity and low self-worth is also known. There is no sense in hiding your truth – just face it and begin the task of changing the thoughts, beliefs and behavior that change you from the inside out. Attitude is simply a reflection of what you really believe and think on the inside. It’s never too late to change and claim your power and joy.

Learning how to change yourself from the inside out is something I love giving people the tools to do for themselves. I think it’s my signature work as a Transformation Life Coach and Counselor. If you’d like help with this, see my website www.spectrumtransformation.com for more information. You can reach me through my Free Consultation button. I’d love to hear from you!

Written by Connie Milligan, LCSW
If there is anything I’ve expressed that speaks to you, I’d love to hear from you. You can reach me at my email, connie [at] conniemilligan [dot] com