July 10, 2017 Blog No Comments

stop fearful thoughts

We all do it. Look completely normal on the outside, like everything is fine and on the inside wage a battle with secret, fearful thoughts. It’s the nasty story line we tell ourselves that’s only aired when we feel desperate. Yet, it keeps us tied in knots and can interfere with our ability to be present and enjoy ourselves.

I first noticed it with my husband.  I could tell something was wrong– he was grumpy, distracted, not listening to me, disconnected, – you know the pattern. Of course, he said he was fine.  It finally dawned on me; he’s worried about his upcoming medical exam. Yup, after it turned out fine, he’s ok.

Then I realized lots of people around me are dealing with this. Some of their fearful thoughts go like this:

  • “I know this relationship is over. I’ll never find love.”
  • “I’m not making enough money. I have so much debt. I’ll never get ahead. “
  • “My work is not happening the way I want. I’m so confused.”

What do you do with these fearful thoughts? How do you keep them from derailing you to the point of plummeting into anxiety and depression? Is there a way to keep them at bay?

Yes, there is something you can do. Let me review some steps that can put fearful thoughts in perspective and eliminate them.

Find The Opposite Thought

For every fearful thought, there is an opposite one, the positive thought, you wish you were thinking. This is the Law of Polarity in action. It’s important because it shows us the path we can take to move out of fear.

Find the opposite thought like: I have a love relationship that completely meets my needs; I have everything I need right now and live abundantly; I have satisfying, creative and successful work.

Every fearful thought has it’s opposite, loving supportive thought.

Generate A New Story

When you have found the opposite, positive thought, focus on it. What is the story you want to tell around this wonderful, supportive thought? Flesh out the details so it becomes something you can actually see and play out in your mind.

The point is to imagine the new story you want to tell. Imagine being in a happy love relationship. Imagine your life full of abundance on your terms. Imagine your work being completely satisfying and successful. Then imagine yourself fully immersed in the details of this new life story.

Tell yourself the story you want, in complete detail.

Feel and Practice It

Once you have imagined the new story in all its details, then pull in the feelings it will generate. Really imagine how you will feel. Keep practicing until it feels natural.

Feel what it’s like to be in love with all the joy of giving and receiving true love. Feel what it is like to not be worried about money, knowing that you are providing for yourself, relaxed and comfortable. Feel the satisfaction of being engaged in work that has meaning and purpose and enjoy its success.

Imagine the new wonderful feelings, and practice them over and over.

Live the New Story

The next step is to begin living as if this new story is real. It has to do with radiating the positive confidence that is generated when you know good things are coming your way.  it has to do with raising your energy to be an energetic match for this new story to actual come in to you.

When you are living the new story you want, not the one that you don’t want, it is simply a matter of time before it appears. Remember, like attracts like. You will bring in what you want when you are fully convinced and believing it is yours to have, without doubts.

Living and believing that your dream is possible, makes it so.

It is possible to stop the fearful thoughts that derail the joy and spontaneity of your life! The Law of Polarity tells us you can start with the intention to bring in its opposite, positive thought with a determined decision to claim the happiness you want in your life. When you practice the new thought, the story that goes with it, experience the accompanying new feelings and live as if it can happen any day – it will happen. Never doubt that this process works. I’ve done it myself many times.

If this is a change process you’d like to explore for yourself and want some assistance, my Transformational Life Coaching can help. I specialize in helping create the transformation that makes your life the one you long for. For more information, see my website, www.spectrumtransformation.com and use my Free Consultation button to reach me. I’d love the opportunity to work with you.

Photo credit – The Good Men Project

Written by Connie Milligan, LCSW
If there is anything I’ve expressed that speaks to you, I’d love to hear from you. You can reach me at my email, connie [at] conniemilligan [dot] com